Not too long ago I was back in the big city taking a course.  I spent some time with my dad and we had some chats.  One of those chats was me coming out to my dad.  I told him about being bi, about how I dated girls while I was married, and so on.  I told him about the dude I was interested in (who is no longer….great disappearing act) and the girl I had a date with before I left town.  I told him that I was poly and that Laine was (is?) monogamous.  He took it really well.  I haven’t had to hide anything since that talk.  It’s been fantastic!

My mother on the other hand…Well that’s been tricky.  She is a pretty closed off lady.  How have I approached my coming out, you may ask.  Baby steps.  Little little steps, with a side of flash!  I called her up a couple weeks ago and during our conversation I casually mentioned my date.  My yoga and brunch date, with a girl.   It went a little something like this:

Me – “I’m doing great! I had a wonderful date with Sue yesterday.  We went to yoga then brunch.  It was our second date”

Mother – “Isn’t that a girls name?” Said with a bit of  hesitancy

Me – “Yes, it was our second date”

Mother – “Oh. …… Well I  need to get ready for the gym now.  We can talk later in the week”

That’s my family.  Don’t like something? Ignore it and/or run away from it.  That’s ok.  I am no longer hiding it.  Baby steps, with a bit of flash.

Right after that phone call I called my dad and told him.  He was quite surprised and asked how it went.  We had a good laugh and said good bye.

I know that with some people coming out to their families has been hard and sometimes a bit awful.  I don’t think it has anything to do with how you do it.  I think it’s really just how the family reacts.  My tactics might not work.  I could be met with a “I never want to hear about it” but that’s her choice to shut me out like that.  I wont hide if I have dates, I wont hide if I have more than one partner,  and I really wont hide if those partners happen to be girls or guys anymore.  I won’t throw it in her face, but I wont hide it either.

Ok, so maybe I just came out as bi (kind of) to my mother, but eventually poly will come out.  My dad asks me about seeing two girls “They both know? They are ok with that? Isn’t that weird” Just so happens they both work together too! Yay poly!

One step at a time.

~Ivy